A victor decides to get out of denial, see the issue for what it truly is, and make the decision to say NO MORE. Fighting the battle is the beginning to winning the battle.
Gabor Mate is an expert in this field, and one his main findings is that the childhood trauma we carry into our adult lives is a key factor as to why we live stressful, bogged down lives. Its situations such as COVID-19 that re-trigger the trauma and cause us to feel the pain, but in ways unlike before.
To identify a trigger, you may need to look back at the last couple days and think to yourself, “What caused me to feel fear?”; “What was I feeling the last time I relapsed?”; “Who in my life makes me feel stressed?”, etc… There are so many revealing questions you can ask, so begin asking… You will be surprised at how much gets revealed!
It’ s also vital to look at one’s past in the way they were raised, treated, communicated with, and cared for. There are so many factors that fly under the radar when asking the questions “Why can’t I quit porn” or “Why am I relapsing so much right now”
The “Dry Drunk” is the one who has recovered because he found sobriety. Someone who is “Healthy” is typically the one who has found what most desire, FREEDOM from their addiction.
I stopped making excuses – I knew I had messed up… Obviously. I had to take full ownership and admit it was 100% my problem and my job to fix it.